Your kids can become leaders - CFN Newsletter Week 134

CHRISTIAN FAMILY NETWORK NEWSLETTER 134

> How to help your kids discover their leadership gifts
> News:
> Church leaders oppose ban on parental smacking
> Nation responds to message about prodigals
> New campaign to help those who have suffered abuse
> Sites:
> Help if your child is strong-willed
> Youth resources galore
> Halloween - strategies and ways to reach those involved in the occult
> Christians can learn from jazz!
> Marriage MOT: Do you honour your partner?
> You've got to laugh: Not many people know that ...
> Members' Zone latest

> OUR SPONSORS FOR THIS WEEK

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> FROM THE EDITOR

Hi there

We're in the midst of working on our Winter edition of Families Together, which will be with you by the end of November. It's packed with great features looking at

• improving your family's communication
• helping your kids steer a safe path online
• practical ways to deal with bullying
• maintaining a life/work balance
• why one Christian mum chose to home educate

Plus news, reviews and much more in an extended 36-page package.

Meanwhile, this week's update includes stacks to help your relationships, your parenting, your spiritual life - and plenty to give you a chuckle too.

Take care

Russ Bravo
Christian Family Network
info@cfnetwork.co.uk
http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk

PS Christian Family Network is here to direct you to the best in parenting, marriage and family resources; to link you up with other Christian families up and down the UK; and to help you make the most of life as a follower of Christ - at home, at work, at school and college, at play and online.

Your feedback, positive and negative, enables us to develop CFN in the way that is most useful for you - so please tell us if we're off the rails or on the button!

And don't forget - if we can pass on material (sample copies of Families Together, leaflets) which will help you tell your friends and your church about CFN, just mail Lyn Bedford at marketing@christianmedia.org.uk and she'll be glad to help you out.

ADVICE

Help kids become leaders

with Whitney Hopler, Crosswalk.com Contributing Writer

Leadership isn't just for those who are outgoing and charismatic. It isn't based on any personality type or tied to any age or background. Instead, it's a set of skills that everyone - including kids - can learn to help them succeed in all areas of life.

If you're a parent, grandparent, teacher, coach, or friend, you can help the kids you care about overcome common challenges and negative peer pressure to reach their fullest potential. You can help them become the leaders God wants them to be.

Here's how you can help kids become leaders:

• Start early. Realize that the most influential leadership training in a child's life comes from his or her parents at home. Let your kids know that they are a top priority in your life. When kids know you care, their confidence soars. Make time to be actively involved in their lives, attending their activities and talking with them regularly. Strive to be a good role model; live the kind of life you want your kids to emulate. Understand what your kids are passionate about, and what challenges they face. Help them extract leadership lessons from their challenges. Point out leadership in action to them as you go about your daily lives, discussing both positive and negative examples. Encourage your kids to get out of their comfort zones and take risks.

• Emphasize teamwork. Recognise that a leader must always work with a team, because leadership is the ability to achieve goals through people. Leaders don't focus just on their own effort, but on how to inspire and motivate a team to achieve goals.

• Motivate them. Help kids understand why they should want to do the hard work necessary to become leaders. Let them know that the rewards of leadership - like satisfaction, meaning, significance, confidence, and contributions to others - far outweigh the rewards of simply following. Show them that leadership is fun. Challenge them, but don't overwhelm them - take time to work with them at their own pace. Empower them to make their own decisions as they grow.

• Hold up a mirror to young leaders. Show kids that they have leadership abilities. Let them know you believe in them and expect great things from them. Listen to what they say about their interests, ambitions, and dreams. Give them opportunities to lead.

• Look for the following traits in them, and affirm them when you spot them: good character (honesty, reliability, maturity, etc)
  
• a boldness to speak up
  
• an ability to come up with creative ideas
  
• an ability to solve problems
  
• courage to take a stand for what they believe
  
• people skills
  
• determination
  
• passion
  
• communication skills
  
• an eagerness to listen and learn
  
• perseverance, confidence
  
• an inquiring mind
  
• discipline (turning up early, etc)
  
• calmness under pressure
  
• an eagerness to work hard
  
• mental toughness
  
• a sense of humour
  
• a readiness to take charge
  
• an ability to follow directions and obey orders
  
• an attitude of inclusiveness and cooperation
  
• raw energy that can be diverted in healthy ways (such as a mischievous yet bright child who needs better outlets for his or her energy)
  
• a positive attitude
  
• an ability to stand out for what matters most (earning admiration for good values, even if not in the popular crowd)
  
• spiritual strengths.
  

Focus more on kids' character traits than you do on their personality traits. Strive to discover and point out their hidden talents and abilities. Encourage them to use those talents and skills through leadership.

• For the rest of this article, head for our Advice section at www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/advice.asp

> THIS WEEK'S NEWS

> Pastors and church leaders oppose ban on parental smacking

More than 650 pastors and Christian leaders from across a wide spectrum of churches have strongly opposed moves to introduce a new law which would turn parents into criminals if they smacked their children.

Go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/news.asp for the full story

> Nation responds to message about prodigals

Church leaders across the UK have been inspired to consider how to encourage people back to faith at Mission Prodigals, a series of events organised by national charity Care for the Family.

Go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/resources.asp for the full story

> CCPAS in new campaign to help those who have suffered abuse

A fresh initiative which aims to tackle the cloak of secrecy that often surrounds abuse among Christians has been announced by the Churches Child Protection Advisory Service (CCPAS).

Go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/news.asp for the full story

> MARRIAGE MOT

Will you honour them?

Another question from the marriage service. Will you honour him/her? What does it mean to honour someone? We honour people these days by giving them a title, OBE, or by throwing a party for them, or giving them a presentation. These things say that we value who they are and what they have contributed to life. For that moment at least they are treated as the most important person there, but how do we honour one another in marriage?

I think that we honour our loved one when we make sure they know they are special to us, the most important person in out life. When we show respect and courtesy, when we listen to them and value what they have to say and what they do for us, when we try to understand what matters to them, when we are loyal and don’t criticize them to others, when we keep their confidences – all these actions honour them and build up the love between us.

Do you honour your spouse?

> Check out our archived marriage tips in the Members' Zone, plus stacks more marriage resources at http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk

> EVENTS

> YOU'VE GOT TO LAUGH ...

• In her later years, Florence Nightingale kept a pet owl in her pocket.
• China is the world's largest market for BMW's top of the line 760Li. This car sells for $200,000 in China - more than almost all people in China make in a lifetime.
• Each year, sixteen million gallons of oil run off pavement into streams, rivers and eventually oceans in the United States. This is more oil than was spilled by the Exxon Valdez.
• In 1985, the most popular waist size for men's trousers was 32. In 2003, it's 36.
• A Brussels Airlines flight to Vienna was aborted because the pilot was attacked in the cockpit. The attacker was a passenger's cat, who got out of its travel bag.
• For more go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/resources.asp

> CHRISTIAN FAMILY NETWORK THIS WEEK
(MEMBERS' ZONE) - http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/default.asp

> Advice

> How to help your kids discover their leadership gifts
> Kate's Marriage advice - Do you honour your partner?

> Resources

> Richard Staples has a problem with festivals
> In search of intimacy - tackling the internet's biggest problem
> Bruce W Anderson issues a family proclamation ...
> Did you know ... ?
> Bringing a Christians presence to the nation's shopping centres
> Real life ads ... that will make you chuckle

> Reviews

> Simon Parkin reports from the new Delirious tour

> News

> Church leaders oppose ban on parental smacking
> Nation responds to message about prodigals
> New campaign to help those who have suffered abuse
> News extra: Background to the smacking debate

> Sites:

> Help if your child is strong-willed
> Youth resources galore
> Halloween - strategies and ways to reach those involved in the occult
> Christians can learn from jazz!

> Events: What's on near you

> Webwatch index: more than 700 sites categorised at your fingertips

> Site Search Engine: the easy way to trawl our 1,000-page plus archives

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