Helping self-harming youngsters - CFN Newsletter Week 142

CHRISTIAN FAMILY NETWORK NEWSLETTER 142

> Cardiff project's pioneering work with self-harming youngsters

> News:
> Surviving as a Christian student
> Use cash only throughout March!
> 1,100 plus abortions on 14s and unders in 2003

> Sites:
> Online Christian magazines for men and women
> Pockets - devotional magazine for kids
> 10 Reasons to Believe this Easter

> Marriage MOT: Try a little tenderness
> You've got to laugh: The story of Joseph ...
> Members' Zone latest

> OUR SPONSORS FOR THIS WEEK

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> FROM THE EDITOR

Hi all

Your Spring issue of Families Together magazine will be with you around Easter time packed with great articles on ...

• how to love your in-laws
• ways to tackle finance and get debt-free
• forgiven - our marriage survived an affair

And much more good stuff designed to equip you better for family life, relationships, parenting and all the challenges of daily life! If you have a friend you'd like us to send a sample copy to, just mail us with their details at info@cfnetwork.co.uk

Enjoy our latest update

God bless!

Russ Bravo
Christian Family Network
info@cfnetwork.co.uk
http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk

PS Christian Family Network is here to direct you to the best in parenting, marriage and family resources; to link you up with other Christian families up and down the UK; and to help you make the most of life as a follower of Christ - at home, at work, at school and college, at play and online.

Your feedback, positive and negative, enables us to develop CFN in the way that is most useful for you - so please tell us if we're off the rails or on the button!

And don't forget - if we can pass on material (sample copies of Families Together, leaflets) which will help you tell your friends and your church about CFN, just mail Lyn Bedford at marketing@christianmedia.org.uk and she'll be glad to help you out.

TEENAGERS

Project raises awareness of youth self-harm

The Amber Project based in Cardiff recently marked St David's Day (1 March) by raising the profile of their work among young people who self-harm.

Currently, the Church Army-run project offers counselling, an advocacy service, a weekly drop-in, and regular series of theatre workshops which use "forum theatre", to provide young people with a safe medium through which they can creatively explore their thoughts, feelings and actions and to look at some of the issues which have impacted upon their lives.

During the past year, awareness of the prevalence of self-harm has grown considerably. However, despite publicity gained by the National Inquiry, the Childline Report and the publication of NICE Guidelines, projects such as The Amber Project often remain acutely under-funded and continuously struggle to meet the demands for their services.

Caryl Stock, Co-ordinator of The Amber Project said: "Young people who harm themselves are frequently struggling to cope with complex and multiple problems. Sadly many still feel isolated and are reluctant to seek support. Not many people are aware that March 1 was Self-injury Awareness Day. Time, perhaps to recognise how many children and young people attempt to cope with the trauma and difficulties in their lives by hurting themselves and to resolve to adequately finance the projects which are working at grass roots level to support them."

'Sarah's story'*

"I used to scratch and bite myself or bang my head against walls when I was angry or frustrated. I don’t remember ever not doing that. I think it was because I wasn’t allowed by my parents to express anger towards others, so I took it out on myself. Then my harming moved on to cutting myself and then to overdosing. It became my way of coping; it became my way of staying alive. I have had severe depression since I was 12 and have had suicidal thoughts. Cutting myself stopped me from doing anything worse.

"I used to hide my cutting from everyone; I thought that I was going mad and that I was the only one who did this. It eventually came out when I cut myself and needed stitches and had to get my dad to take me to A&E.

"In a way it was a relief that people knew and I didn’t have to hide it, but people can be cruel. I’ve been called a freak and a loony and I’ve been told that I’m just attention-seeking, but that’s not true. How can it be attention-seeking when I kept it a secret for so long? I’ve also had bad experiences at A&E. One doctor said ‘Why should I stitch you up when you are going to do it again?’ But they wouldn’t refuse to treat someone with severe asthma due to excessive smoking and that’s just as much self-inflicted.

"It’s really hard to get help. I’m currently homeless because there is nowhere in Cardiff for young women who self-harm and need 24-hour support to live. I’m stuck in hospital and I’ve had enough of being there. I’m 20 years old and I want a life."

* Name has been changed, but this is a real story of one youngster the Amber Project has worked with.

• Church Army is a society of evangelists within the Anglican Communion, which exists to enable people to come to a living faith in Jesus Christ.

> THIS WEEK'S NEWS

> Surviving as a Christian student

West Yorkshire School of Christian studies (WYSOCS) are looking for young people for their gap year course which will equip them for university and beyond.

Go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/news.asp for the full story

> Use cash only throughout March!

Rob Parsons and Care for the Family are spearheading a campaign this month, asking Christians and others to use cash rather than plastic cards wherever possible, in order to highlight the problem of debt and easy credit.

Go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/news.asp for the full story

> 1,100 plus abortions on 14s and under in 2003

Due to a request under the Freedom of Information Act, the Department of Health (DoH) has disclosed that in the calendar year 2003, there were 1023 abortions performed on 14-year-olds and 148 for those under 14.

Go to http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/news.asp for the full story

> MARRIAGE MOT

Try a little tenderness

One thing I’ve noticed that’s often missing from struggling relationships is tenderness, that gentle handling of each other that communicates care and love in a very special way. It makes me think of handling a new born baby or a fragile butterfly cupped in my hands. The aim is to protect and reassure and hold safely.

I wonder why tenderness is often seen as a sign of weakness in our society and especially in men. Yet in films, a strong yet tender man always gets my heart fluttering.

There is something comforting and healing about tenderness. It dispels fear and hurt and replaces it with warmth and security.

Learning to treat each other with tenderness can take time, but it’s possible for all of us. How could you become more tender in your dealings with your loved one? Will you try?

> Check out our archived marriage tips in the Members' Zone, plus stacks more marriage resources at http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk

> EVENTS

> YOU'VE GOT TO LAUGH ...

An RE class was discussing the story of Joseph.
"What great crime did these sons of Jacob commit?" asked the teacher.
"They sold their brother Joseph," came the swift response.
"Quite right. And for how much?"
"Twenty pieces of silver," answered another alert pupil.
"And what added to the cruelty and wickedness of these bad brothers?" continued the teacher.
No-one answered, so the teacher tried again: "What made their treachery even more detestable?"
Another silence followed before a hand shot up and its owner answered breathlessly: "Please sir - they sold him too cheap."

> CHRISTIAN FAMILY NETWORK THIS WEEK
(MEMBERS' ZONE) - http://www.cfnetwork.co.uk/members/default.asp

> Advice

> Kate's Marriage advice - try a little tenderness
> Eric Spellmann on his most useful websites
> Ways to combat poverty - 2005's big campaign

> Resources

> Understanding the issues on current euthanasia legislation
> Fresh challenge for school leaders to be architects of the future
> Cardiff project's work with self-harming teenagers

> News:
> Surviving as a Christian student
> Use cash only throughout March!
> 1,100 plus abortions on 14s and unders in 2003

> PLUS news extra: help at hand for internet pornography addicts; Mothers' Union verdict on Lib-Dem manifesto for women

> Sites:
> Online Christian magazines for men and women
> Pockets - devotional magazine for kids
> 10 Reasons to Believe this Easter

> Events: What's on near you

> Webwatch index: more than 700 sites categorised at your fingertips

> Site Search Engine: the easy way to trawl our 1,000-page plus archives

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