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RELATIONSHIPS

Married couples should make love more, says evangelist


Evangelist Andy Economides of Soteria Trust says married Christians need more sex!

And to make the point he has produced a small book called More Sex Please, We’re Married which is full of tips to help people enjoy a better relationship.

Andy, who has spoken on relationships during hundreds of church events, said: “Every married couple needs to make love more regularly – and on the whole, the vast majority are not doing it enough!

“Whenever I talk about love, sex and marriage I get an amazing response – people want to talk about it, to discuss it with me, to get advice and help. I speak in Churches in Africa as well as in Europe and it’s the same wherever I go.”

But he admits that some churches won’t ask him back because they don’t like the subject talked about openly.

He said: “Some Christians – and churches – have a Victorian viewpoint on sex – maybe even worse! They are still afraid to talk about it, and it’s an issue that needs open discussion.”

“Once in Wales, speaking at a Christian conference centre, a man approached me afterwards and said he felt the use of the word ‘sex’ in that context was not appropriate. I was very intrigued at that, so at the next session I mentioned marriage and sex again, and afterwards up he came again and complained again.

“It makes some people very uncomfortable to speak openly, but I know married Christians are not having enough sex because when they do open up, they tell me all the time.”

Andy is keen to get people talking about the subject and admits some of the content of his five-chapter book is controversial for that reason.

He said: “I saw a couple interviewed on TV, about to get married, saying they thought that sex was the icing on the cake. That is a million miles away from the truth! It’s not the icing on the cake – it is the cake! In a cake you need certain ingredients – and a healthy sexual relationship is one of the vital ingredients.”

But Andy’s advice – and his book – is not all about sex. He says to make a marriage work there are certain basic needs that are equally important; communication, give and take, mutual respect, spending time together and allowing each other to flourish.

Andy said: “A lot of people are content with a good marriage, but I think we can have a great marriage. What is enough sex? People have suggested once a week, twice a week, but I think it’s more than that! Enough sex is what your partner says is enough. What you want is not what counts. Just take a look at 1 Corinthians 7: 1-5.”

He maintains this is not helped by church preachers refusing to talk about it – if they did, then people at home would go home and feel more able to discuss their issues.

And he says talking about sex will open up other issues, ie: “I’m not going to make love with you because you never talk to me, you never take an interest in my job or what I do; all you do is sit in front of the telly.”

“It might open a can of worms, but that will have to be opened one day, and the sooner the better, and then they can on and enjoy a healthy sexual relationship!”

And how about Andy’s love life? Ask him and see a big Greek Cypriot smile appear across his face...

  • For a copy of More Sex Please, We’re Married at the reduced price of £5.00 inc P&P, write to Soteria Trust, 23 Windsor Rd, Chichester PO19 2XF.

 

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