Missionary "finishers" grateful to kids
By Kenneth D MacHarg, Latin American Mission News Service
A phenomenon
particular to the past 15 years has been an increasing number of "mature"
adults (those over 50) who have chosen to end their professional careers
and begin service as missionaries.
Commonly known as "Finishers," this group of experienced
professionals has decided that having climbed the career ladders,
sent their children off to college and achieved many of the goals
of their lives, they feel called by the Lord to contribute their experience
and wisdom to God's kingdom through full-time missionary service prior
to retirement.
Many mission agencies have developed special programmes to attract
this demographic group. Southern Baptists call their program "Masters
- Second Career folks on Mission with God." The Masters program
differs from normal career service in that candidates commit only
to two or three years of service at a minimum, do not have to meet
educational requirements, and attend a three-day orientation program,
as opposed to up to eight or nine weeks of pre-field training.
Other missions, such as LAM, work closely with people in this group
to place them in appropriate ministries where they can serve and yet
still meet family obligations and responsibilities back home.
While younger missionaries who commit to overseas service often seek
parental and sibling support to fulfil their call, Finishers must
deal with the dual or triple dynamic of leaving behind aging parents,
children and often grandchildren as well.
That separation, especially from children and grandchildren, can be
wrenching. Yet children can actually help build a home-based supporting
team and they themselves often become part of that sending team.
"We have greatly appreciated our son Peter's efforts at support-raising
for us," reported Shelley Rice, an LAM missionary serving with
her husband Craig in Costa Rica. "Last autumn, we sent e-mails
to many people, including Peter, a college junior, asking them to
consider increasing their support of our ministry. Peter sent e-mails
to many of his friends asking them to consider supporting us. At least
four of his friends have supported us financially, and many have prayed
for us."
Crucial support
Having the support of grown children is important to the success of
any later-in-life missionaries who, contrary to our society's pattern
where children leave the nest, pack up and take the children's nest
with them and to some extent their security. Our own son, after we
had left for missionary service in Ecuador while he was a sophomore
in college, once remarked that one day it suddenly occurred to him
that he no longer had a home to go to during the holidays.
Chuck and Carol Morton, former LAM missionaries who entered service
in their 50s, reported on their struggle with leaving children behind.
"It's one thing applying to become missionaries. It's quite another
actually receiving the call and having to make the decision to give
up two high-paying jobs, a comfortable lifestyle and consider moving
far away from one's children and grandchildren. It was especially
difficult for Carol because of having to move away from the children
and grandchildren.
"But, we both came to the conclusion that if this was what God
wanted us to do (and we both felt this), then it was what we must
do and that He would provide for our needs and deal with our feelings
regarding leaving and missing our family," Chuck continued.
Painful departure
When my wife, Polly, and I sought out missionary service in our late
40s, we also faced the same dilemma and stresses. Writing about it
in a book several years after we entered missionary service, I reflected:
Our departure "was perfect timing as far as our family was concerned.
Perfect in the Lord's sight, but nonetheless painful for us. Beth
(our daughter) was 22 and living on her own when we left. Atlanta
was a long way from Louisville, but telephone calls were easier within
the country and mail quicker (than from Ecuador).
“Brian (our son) was 20, and a sophomore at college in Florida.
No one could be more proud or more confident of their children than
we are. What two absolutely fine human beings they are. We say that
not to take credit for what they have become, but to give thanks to
the Lord for blessing us with such fine children. Deciding to leave
them behind and go off to another land was very difficult.
"It could not have been done with all children. We knew, however,
that Beth and Brian were responsible individuals and ready to be on
their own. We knew they could make it without their parents standing
by - in fact at their age they would just as soon make it on their
own. But parents never give up the responsibility of being parents
even when the job is done.
"So, the time came to tell Beth and Brian that we had applied.
We know it was not easy for them. They made it so much easier for
us by giving us their blessing and saying they knew that we had wanted
to do this for some time. I doubt they or anyone will ever know the
tears we shed as we left and the pain we have felt many times since.
"How often I have struggled with Matthew 10:37-39: 'Anyone who
loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone
who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and
anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of
me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life
for my sake will find it.'
"The Lord gave Beth and Brian to us as gifts. As with all children,
that gift is temporary. The time comes when they move on to live their
own lives according to what God's will is for them. Of course, parents
always love them (and unfortunately aren't always good at giving up
the parental role).
“We know that raising them and giving them to the Lord is part
of the task we have been given. So, we moved on, trusting them to
the Lord's care, knowing we would see them as often as possible, and
would always be available to them if they needed us."
- (From
Don't Rush the Lord; A Pilgrimage to God's Purpose by Kenneth
D. MacHarg, © 1997, William Carey Library, Pasadena, CA, pages
16-18.)
- Latin America Mission works in partnership with churches and Christian agencies throughout Latin America and supports missionaries and projects in many Latin countries as well as in Spain.
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